Selina Loves Love

NYC LIFE: RANDOM DAY IN BROOKLYN

2011-07-05T13:53:00.000-07:00

Brooklyn Flea Market

Rob looking at some old map.

Chuckie's brides

Brooklyn Fashion.

Random video shoot.

All gold everything.

Back in the day photo.

One mans junk is another mans treasure.

My shoes are made for walking.

Plastic toys on a shelf lol

Now this is what you call vintage...it sounded surprisingly good.

American flag in America.

Colourful Prints.

This guys art was DOPE!

Guys with the bowties.

Teeny weeny cupcakes...I prefer Crumbs.

My granny has loads of bags like these.

Arms crossed, american flag, army pants.

Sale on the steps of a brownstone.

Mr Robby chillin'.

Me and the pose.

Peeps on Clermont Av.

The locals.

Contrast. Little Cafe vs Urban Store.

Rob leaning on the pole...I like this...

Me and my big smile.

Cookout.

NYC LIFE: MOS DEF - FORT GREENE FESTIVAL

2011-07-04T09:25:00.000-07:00

Mr Sexy Mos Def himself hit up Fort Greene Festival. The day was full of vibes and boootiful people, and it was FREE!!!....I had mad fun. Check out the snaps :)

Slyvia, Dipo, Ronnie and Moi

The lovely Jess and Mariella

Sexy Mos Def

NYC LIFE: NEW YORK MEN

2011-06-09T06:13:00.000-07:00

I regularly catch up with my girlfriends back home, via BBM, What’s app or some other free communication method (Give thanks for digital technology). We start with the general "How u doing?”, "How’s your family?" chit chatter. Then without a doubt the "You got a man yet?" question pops up. I always answer "No" (unfortunately) followed by an explanation of the mad experiences that I've had. And yes, I've had some crazy experiences in the NY dating world. Let me fill you in.

*Disclaimer*
Names of people mentioned in the post have been changed/omitted for my personal safety (I ain't kidding). Keeping them anonymous also ensures I don’t get sued, as for some weird reason everybody loves to sue in the US.

Date #1: UNDERCOVER GUN POPPIN' GANGSTER

* He looked a bit like him, cute huh?

Picture this. 6ft 2inc, dark chocolate, muscular build, jet black locs swinging past he’s shoulders. It was a look made for one of them nude black men calenders (gotta keep it real) lol. Surprisingly, it wasn’t actually he’s looks that caught my attention; it was he’s Tribe Called Quest ringtone, as hip-hop is my heartbeat. I was at work, and he was delivering the Dasani water and the sound of ‘Bonita Applebum’ echoed through the silent office so I had to turn round. I saw him and smiled (any sane heterosexual woman would of), he came over to my desk; we started chatting and exchanged numbers. Following on from there we exchanged a few text messages, telephone conversations and then he invited me out and I accepted.

We met in a Chinese restaurant close to where I live, he came dressed in a white tee and jeans – the casual look, the way I like it *big smile*. The food was nice the conversation was somewhat ok; we discussed regular things like he’s job, my job, how I was enjoying New York. It was pleasant, but nothing like the 'deep' convo's I'm used to.

The meal finished, we left and he dropped me NEAR (safety first) my house. There was mini hurricane outside so the plan was for me sit in he’s jeep until the possibility of me being blown away was eradicated. So we sat, and talked. He then proceeded to show me the photos of himself in he’s i-phone, which I thought was bit weird, but whatever. So as we were scrolling through the photo’s one in a particular caught my attention. It was extremely disturbing. It was a self-taken photo. He was standing there looking in a bathroom mirror holding a gun to he’s head. So I asked the obvious question “What are you doing?”, he was like “I was having a bad day”, I replied “So you put a gun to your head!??”. Any regular person would have ran at this point. But no no, not me, I don’t do normal. Being the inquisitive person I am, I stupidly digged a little deeper. (I'm actually shaking my head at myself writing this lol).

So anyway, I asked him if he's ever used the gun before. He's response was a straight-faced, police examination room style "No comment". It rolled off he’s tongue like he’d said it many time before. He decided to put the icing on the cake when he then proceeded to give me an unprompted in-depth explanation of the situations that would lead to him killing me with he’s gun. Let me remind you, this was still a date! He was talking something about having to eliminate anyone that was a witness to one of he’s crimes. Yes, ELIMINATE. To be honest, at this point I weren’t really paying attention I was focused on planning the quickest and safest exit strategy. Midway through something he was saying, I politely said goodbye and ran (Usain Bolt speed) home in the storm.

It’s typical that the first date I go on in NY is with a undercover gun poppin’ gangster.

So, my search for 'My Soul Mate Husband’ continues…

*Source

NYC LIFE: SUNSET ON 10TH STREET

2011-06-06T13:07:00.000-07:00

RIP GIL SCOTT-HERON

2011-05-29T09:27:00.000-07:00

GILBERT "GIL" SCOTT-HERON

April 1, 1949 – May 27, 2011

I wish you a peaceful transition brother.

"The first change that takes place is in your mind. You have to change your mind before you change the way you live and the way you move......the thing that's going to change people is something that no one will ever be able to capture on film. It will just be something that you see and then all of a sudden you will realise, I’m on the wrong page or I'm on the right page but I'm on the wrong note" - Gil Scott-Heron

Check the video below....

NYC LIFE: CRUMBS BAKE SHOP (CUP CAKE HEAVEN)

2011-05-29T08:48:00.000-07:00

The whole being a vegan idea seems impossible when every time I step into a Crumbs Bake Shop.

I'm not a big fan of cake to be honest, but when it comes to carrot cake no one can keep me away. Its second in line to yellow packet peanut M&M's (which I'm currently addicted to). Crumbs do the BEST carrot cake in New York and the whole wide world, they're so moist and yummy. Oh and apparently the shop was on Sex In The City. See below pictures of mine and Tana's visit to Crumbs.

The Divine Carrot Cake

Tana being Ghetto in the Cake Shop SMH

Me admiring the Carrot Cake

Tana and her cake, not as good as the Carrott Cake

Tana being weird Tana

The remains of the Carrot Cake

I certainly could

NYC LIFE: NEW YORK CARES VOLUNTEERING

2011-05-25T09:45:00.000-07:00

Last week I was in my element when I spent half a day volunteering as part of the New York Cares program. Nothing makes me happier than giving back and helping people after all smiles are priceless. When this program was brought to my attention I signed up on the website, attended a 1 hour orientation session then ey presto! I was good to go.

On the website there's hundreds of projects to choose from such as reading bedtime stories to children, planting trees, jewellery making. Something for everybody. I decided I'd have a go at sorting clothes in a Housing Works warehouse. Being a shopoholic may slightly have influenced my decision, I'm not gonna lie lol. Housing works has thrift stores (charity shops for my UK people) all across NY, their proceeds going to helping people homeless people that are living with AIDS. Sounded good to me!!

On the day I caught the 7 train to the Warehouse in Queens. I had no idea what to expect when I first got there, but thankfully everyone was warm and enthusiastic. The warehouse was full to the brim of donated second hand clothes, shoes and bags. I've never seen anything quite like it.

I was assigned the task of putting coats on hangers.

The clothes that I hung up

Whilst I was there I made friends with Crystal and Marsha to very animated talkative characters. They were hilarious.

Crystal (back) Marsha (Front) and the green tees

Marsha and I

The earrings and I

I feel I made positive contribution by being there, although I was only hanging up clothes the energy that I took to complete the task will in the long run help somebody in need. Its what they call the 'ripple effect'. I'll definitely will being do another project so time soon. Watch this space.

TINY WISDOM

2011-05-24T09:32:00.000-07:00

"Just when the caterpillar thought the world was over, it became a butterfly" - Proverb

NYC LIFE: A NIGHT WITH JESSE BOYKINS III

2011-05-20T13:22:00.000-07:00

Anyone that knows me, knows I LOVE Jesse Boykins. I found him accidentally one day just browsing random youtube videos, as you do. I've been hooked ever since. I would describe him as having a cool relaxed Dwele vibe fused with sensual Brian Mcknight lyrics, fused with a slick sexy Joe voice. Sounds epic right?, yeh I know.

When my girl told me he was doing a free show in NYC. I had to be there.

I've seen him live once before in Cargo, London sometime last year. I was lets just say, extremely tipsy, so I remember that night vaguely. All I know is that I had a few too many Rosé's and I was in the audience screaming from the pit of my belly like a crazy groupie in a practically silent crowd. People were giving me the side eye the whole night lol. When you watch video's of that show you can actually hear me, mega embarrassing. I totally blame it on the alcohol, ain't got nothing to do with me lol. So, this was the perfect opportunity to see him again, sober.

The night was in aid of Suit Dreams, an initiative that's set up to provide suits to Black young men in Brooklyn that have completed high school but don't have a suit to wear to their graduation prom. As part of the program the young people are also mentored by top business men who encourage and guide them in pursuing their dreams. Its a beautiful concept.

I printed out my google map directions and hooked up with Ba'Ra and we made our way (with great difficulty) to the venue. The event was held at Katra Lounge.

We got to the venue around 8 ish, to find Jesse Boykins standing outside, I saw him and my knees got wobbly and butterflies zoomed around in my belly. Ba'Ra told me acting a "straight up fool" lol - you gotta love hes bluntness lol. You've probably already gathered that I think Jesse Boykins is SEXY, my crush on him is simply ridiculous lol.

The club had a warm Moroccan vibe going on, it was filled with handsome men in sharp suit that made me wish I had dressed up, oh well. Inside was packed and the atmosphere was pleasant. For a while Ba'Ra and I just hung around, navigating our way through the herds of people. We discovered there was a downstairs that was even more ram then upstairs, it was bit too much so we went back up. And there he was, standing in the VIP area, Jesse Boykins. Ba'Ra told me to go ask him for a picture, after a bit of hesitation and him dragging me to Jesse, I went.

I went over and I shyly asked Jesse for a photo he said "Aint you that girl from London?" - it was definately a 'floor just swallow me up moment' the embarrassment was too much lol. I suppose the positive side of it is that he remembered me (even if it I was in my drunken state). We took a photo.

I look a bit busted, but we make a cute couple

Ba'Ra chilling on the red cushions

He's show was amazing. Like always he was full of energy and had me questioning why he is such an underrated artist. Along side he live band he performed 'Prototype', 'Amorous', 'Itis', "Pantyhose' and quite a few other tracks. Part way through the show he came into the audience and sang to me, OH MY LIFE - I nearly died.

The girl he brought on stage - totally feeling her style

Overall, I had a great time, beautiful company (Ba'Ra), beautiful men, beautiful music and beautiful New York City. What more could I girl ask for?

NYC LIFE: FIRST VEGAN RESTURANT EXPERIANCE

2011-05-20T08:15:00.000-07:00

Yesterday, I met up with my lovely amazing friend Ba'Ra we spent a couple of hours wondering round Canal Street (counterfeit central). I purchased a bright yellow bag and some chunky thick wooden colourful bangles (I'll upload a photo later). This season I'm overdosing on colourful clothes and accessories, my friends motto 'Rainbow yourself happy' is on constant replay in my head - alongside all the other strange voices lol. Anyway, after all this walking bellies started rumbling and hunger set in. Ba'Ra being a vegan, and me being a pescatarian meant that walking into McDonalds and grabbing a big mac was a big hell no.

Ba'Ra recommended a Vegan spot called Wild Ginger. When he first explained that it was Vegan Chinese restaurant, I was like 'Huh, you gotta be kidding me'. I mean, what vegan chinese food is there, noodles and broccolli??. I decided to give it a try, 'what don't kill me can only make me stronger' and all of that. So we arrived.

I didn't have a clue what anything was on the menu, but Ba'Ra gave me a full breakdown. In the end I ordered 'General Tsao's Soy Protein'. The food arrived.

The yummy food

Are you thinking what I was thinking?? It looks like chicken!! Let me start by saying the food was DELICIOUS. It looked and tasted JUST like chicken. My brain couldn't actually process the fact it wasn't chicken. Ba'Ra explained to me over 10 times that is was actually soy protein made to taste like chicken. The imitation was so on point it was unbelievable.


Ba'RA and the soy protein (chicken)

Me and the empty plate

After this little experience, I am actually contemplating becoming a vegan. It opened me up to a whole new whole of tasty vegan food that I never even knew existed.

HAPPY EARTHDAY MALCOLM X (MY HERO)

2011-05-19T09:23:00.000-07:00

YOUR LEGACY LIVES. YOUR NAME LIVES. YOUR SPIRIT LIVES. YOU LIVE.

THANK YOU MALCOLM X

(Check out some of my favorite Malcolm X quotes)

"There is no better than adversity. Every defeat, every heartbreak, every loss, contains its own seed, its own lesson on how to improve your performance the next time."

"Despite my firm convictions, I have been always a man who tries to face facts, and to accept the reality of life as new experience and new knowledge unfolds it. I have always kept an open mind, which is necessary to the flexibility that must go hand in hand with every form of intelligent search for truth."

"And just because you have colleges and universities doesn't mean you have education."

(Check out the video!!)

“Who taught you to hate the texture of your hair? Who taught you to hate the color of your skin, to such extent that you bleach to get like the white man? Who taught you to hate the shape of your nose, and the shape of your lips? Who taught you to hate yourself, from the top of your head to the soles of your feet?”

NYC LIFE: NNEKA @ SOBS

2011-05-19T08:45:00.000-07:00

Last week Friday, I was blessed to be able to go and see Nneka @ SOB (Sound Of Brazils). I'm going to be honest, before I went I wasn't the biggest Nneka fan. I was totally feeling that 'Heartbeat' track (the video reminds me of my second home The Gambia) and I could hum along to some of the songs from her 'No Longer at ease' album. To say I was a fanatic, would have been taking a bit too far. HOWEVER, after seeing her live I AM HOOKED.

Her whole set was acoustic; it had the whole 'Lauryn Hiill Unplugged album' feel going on. It was full of genuine passion and emotion; she shed a few tears during some of the songs. It was obvious, she felt and meant single every word she sang. It came from the heart. The thing I really digged about the concert was her honesty and truth, she had the confidence to freely say what she taught without being apologetic. A quality that is rare. I was entranced by the intimate set for a long beautiful hour.

So, since last Friday until now I have had 'Valley' on repeat - check it out! Peep below one of the tracks she performed on the night.

The night was also a significant night for me. It was the first concert I've EVER been to ALONE. Goooo ME!! :)

I ROCKED THIS! I LOVE THEM EARRINGS (HARLEM BABBY)

THE POWER OF A GREAT DEBATE

2011-03-02T02:09:00.000-08:00

I’ve just finished a heated but respectful 1 hour political twitter debate with a complete stranger. I’m now reflecting on how totally random and out the blue it was but on the flip side how healthy an exchange of conflicting ideas and opinion is once in a while.

My main social circle I must admit consists of a group of people that uphold the same morals, values and ideologies as me (most of the time). Although this is very pleasant, unconsciously a ‘group think’ mentality sometimes does set in. In certain circumstances this collective mindset can be detrimental to the fertile foundation that is needed for new seeds of ideas to blossom. A good ole’ tongue waggle with a passionate person/people whose views clash with my own is something that I find myself at times yearning for. It’s got nothing to do with my ego or always wanting be right, it’s purely due to the fact that it always aids in some type of growth (although I may be highly irritated at the time).

I’ve had countless debates in my life time, however this one particular stands out due to the platform on which we communicated and the fact and I didn’t know this person from Adam. Not even a profile picture to put an unknown face to the unknown name, nada. A complete and utter stranger. Upon reflection this unexpected debate allowed me to get into the mind of the mysterious stranger and see issues/thoughts from a totally new perspective. It highlighted the flaws in some of my opinions subsequently creating a shift in my outlook, in this instance on the global political landscape. It provided a platform on which my knowledge was showcased and lack of knowledge was equally brought to the forefront. A few of my character traits which I don’t often scrutinise reared their heads, such as my unapologetically opinionated nature. However, my years of training of in not being afraid or ashamed to admit when I’m wrong have definitely paid off ultimately bringing about balance in myself. Most importantly it showed that respect and keeping an open mind at all times is essential to a great debate (and most things in life). The stubborn ‘You can’t tell me nothing’ mentality can obstruct life lessons and new information, preventing mind expansion – and what good is that?

To sum up my experience I created this quote:

“A great debate opens eyes and unlocks minds”

Love and light

Selina x

MY POETRY: NATURE'S PERFECTION

2011-03-01T02:20:00.000-08:00

Source

Butterflies flutter,
Softly,
Smoothly,
Like multicoloured raindrops,
In the….
cool breeze,
Gently caressing leaves
That sway to
Harmonies of jubilant elation
Sung by birds
For the morning skies
As the suns warm kisses
Stroke flower petals
Individually,
Blissfully
So…
Perfectly.

TINY WISDOM #1

2011-03-01T01:17:00.000-08:00

The other day I watched 'Eat, Pray, Love'. If you haven't already seen this film I HIGHLY recommend you go watch it. I don't want to give too much away, but in short its the story of a lady that searching for something more in her life. She leaves her husband and job and sets off on a exciting journey filled with joy, spirituality and love.

The film is full to the brim with beautiful quotes, but this one is the one that stuck with me:

"...I've come to believe that there exists in the universe something I call "The Physics of The Quest" - a force of nature governed by laws as real as the laws gravity or momentum. And the rule of Quest Physics maybe goes like this: "If you are brave enough to leave behind everything familiar and comforting (which can be anything from your house to your bitter old resentments) and set out on a truth-seeking journey (either externally or internally), and if you are truly willing to regard everything that happens to you on that journey as a clue, and if you accept everyone you meet along the way as a teacher, and if you are prepared - most of all - to face (and forgive) some very difficult realities about yourself....then truth will not be withheld from you." Or so I've come to believe."

[[;[

lkmlk

POSITIVE SOUNDS #1: JOY JONES - BEAUTIFUL

2011-02-28T10:18:00.000-08:00

This positive and uplifting song is a great reminder that we are ALL beautiful, in ALL ways ALWAYS!

Lyrics:

"I'm beautiful yes I am,

despite the lies I've been told I still am,

yes it may seem a bit bold but I am,

and its cos God made me so that I am"

CHOOSE A GOOD MAN NOT A HOOD MAN

2011-02-28T09:20:00.000-08:00

It was a rainy Tuesday and I was listening to the radio, driving my usual route towards work, when Destiny’s Child song “Solider” came on the radio. Without hesitating, I reached for the volume dial and turned up the tune. From the top of my lungs (sounding like Mariah Carey – although some may beg to differ) I sang along: “If his status ain't hood, I ain't checkin' for him, betta be street if he lookin' at me”. After belting out the chorus I had to pause and think about how ridiculous the catchy song words were, “If his status ain't hood, I ain't checkin' for him”, are these women actually serious?

The desire that young girls and grown women have for Bad Boys never ceases to amaze, some may call them boring but to me a Good Man is much more appealing. Let me break it down for you.

The stereotypical media portrayal of this desirable Hood Man that women across the globe are desperately yearning for normally goes something like this: He has 3 or 4 “baby mommas” one of which always has a stalker-ish mentality, he has one “wifey” with countless “tings” on the side to please his nymphomaniac “gyalist” tendencies. He owns a Benz with the chrome wheels still spinning even when he parked up 30 minutes ago, busses 11 bottles of Moët every time he hits a rave with the “man dem”, he’s respected but also feared by the masses. His life is full of excitement with drive by shootings and drug deals taking place on a regular basis as his income is a result of an occupation that can range from anything from a Kingpin, Gangster Rapper to a Pimp.

Maybe I have exaggerated a tiny bit, but I’m sure you get the picture. This manufactured materialistic unattainable persona is what a lot of men aspire to be, and who a lot of women aspire to be with. I don’t know about you, but it sounds like way too much drama to me. Getting a man that showers me with Louis Vuitton bags one day but can’t afford a tea bag the day after is a fantasy that I can openly admit to not relating to. If on a daily basis you’re constantly worrying about your man going to a cell or a cemetery then that is not a good look, no matter how much you try to convince yourself it is.

So, let’s speak about the good man. People normally associate the “good” man to money and wealth but I strongly disagree. To me, a “good” man is a man that firstly loves and respects himself, because without self love you have no love for anybody. A man with manners and respect, any man that can refer to you as a “ting” and “gyal” should be eliminated from your life - immediately. A man that honours you, if a man likes you he will go out of his way to show you, if you’re sitting by your phone for 3 hours praying for him to call or if he only calls you after 11pm then move on and remember actions speak louder than words. A man with ambition, if he’s making positive legitimate movements in his life and is trying to make a future for himself, while encouraging you to do the same then support him. All you need to see is potential, even if the end result is not in the here and now. In essence, a Good Man is a man that is good to you, that adds value to your already amazing life.

It would be foolish of me to proclaim every man to be perfect as I’ve had a few broken hearts in my short lifetime, but there is an abundance of Good Men out there, and they are not becoming extinct any time soon. What I have learnt from my relationships is that you have to realise that you deserve the best before you can get the best, set your standards and don’t alter them for anybody. You also have to be the person that you desire to be with, you can’t expect to get man with a well paid 9 to 5 but be sitting in your yard collecting JSA watching Jeremy Kyle every morning, it’s just not realistic.

A lot of women are unaware of the power they hold, most men do what they do to impress us, so if we all demanded more than they would have to change their ways. Ultimately, being a “ride and live chick” is more appealing to me than being a “ride or die chick”, because I don’t know about you, but, I love my life.

Stay blessed,

Selina x